Emotional Dysregulation, Anxiety and the Power of Journaling

I want to talk about something that took me a long time to understand: emotional dysregulation. For years, I thought I was just “too sensitive” or “overreacting”, but it turns out there was a lot more going on under the surface. If you live with anxiety, ADHD, autism or any form of neurodivergence, emotional dysregulation might be part of your daily life too.

So what is emotional dysregulation?

For me, it is when emotions feel bigger than I know how to handle in the moment. It is not just feeling upset or excited; it is an intense wave that can sweep over you so quickly that logical thinking takes a back seat. This could mean getting extremely angry over something small, bursting into tears for what looks like no reason, or feeling paralysed by fear in situations that others seem to manage just fine.

When you have an anxiety disorder, emotional dysregulation can be even trickier. Anxiety often primes your body to be on high alert, and emotions can go from zero to a hundred in seconds. It can feel like your nervous system is constantly braced for bad news. If you also happen to be neurodivergent, this can be amplified. Many neurodivergent brains process sensory information and emotions differently, so what might seem like a small trigger to someone else can feel massive to you.

The connection between emotional dysregulation and daily life

When emotions spike quickly, decision-making can get harder. I have made impulsive choices in moments of high emotion and later wished I had paused. I have also avoided things I wanted to do because I could not face the emotional overwhelm that might come with them. In relationships, emotional dysregulation can create misunderstandings. People might think you are overreacting or moody when in reality you are trying to manage a wave of feeling that hit you out of nowhere.

Without tools to help regulate emotions, daily life can start to feel unpredictable. You might find yourself avoiding situations, people, or opportunities because you are worried about how you will react.

How journaling changed things for me

I used to think journaling was just writing “Dear Diary” entries about my day, going over every little detail for hours on end with no real insight being gained. But I discovered that journaling, especially bullet journaling, can be one of the most practical tools for emotional regulation.

Bullet journaling is more than just writing. It is a structured way to capture thoughts, emotions, and patterns. For me, it became a space where I could slow down and separate the facts from the feelings. When you are in the middle of emotional dysregulation, it can feel impossible to untangle what is happening, just a blur. But when you take the time to write things down, you create distance between the trigger and the reaction.

Discovery Journal's Yearly Mood Calendar

Discovery Journal - Neurodiverse Version

For example, I started tracking my moods daily. I would jot down not just “anxious” or “angry” but also the physical sensations I noticed, the thoughts I was having, and the situation I was in at the time. Over time, this created a map of my emotional patterns and behaviours. I could see that certain times of day, environments, or interactions were more likely to trigger big emotions. That awareness made it easier to prepare for those situations or to approach them differently.

By breaking it down and looking at each interaction, enviroment and mood on its own, that's where I started seeing patterns and making links between how I was feeling and what I was doing at the time.

Have a peak at Discovery Journal

Learning to use emotive language

One of the most surprising benefits of journaling was how it helped me expand my emotional vocabulary. At first, I would write things like “I feel tired” or “I feel stressed.” But the more I journaled, the more I challenged myself to find words that captured my feelings. Instead of “stressed,” maybe I was “overwhelmed,” “pressured,” or “underprepared.” Instead of “bad,” maybe I was “disappointed,” “ashamed,” or “lonely.”

Why does this matter? Because naming an emotion precisely is a step towards regulating it. When you can label what you are feeling, your brain starts to process it differently. You move from being swept away by the feeling to being an observer of it.

This is especially important for anyone who grew up without much guidance on how to handle emotions. If no one taught you how to recognise and name what you feel, you might have learned to push emotions down or let them explode. Neither of those strategies works well in the long run. Journaling helps fill in that missing skill.

The benefits of learning proper emotional regulation

Since I started using journaling as part of my daily routine, I have noticed big changes. I recover from emotional spikes faster. I can see patterns in my anxiety before they catch me off guard. I have a better sense of what helps me calm down and what tends to make things worse.

Proper emotional regulation does not mean you never feel big emotions. It means you have the tools to ride the wave instead of being dragged under. For me, this has meant fewer impulsive decisions, more stable relationships, and a lot more trust in myself.

It also means I can engage more fully with life. When I am not constantly bracing for the next emotional blow, I have more energy to spend on things I enjoy.

What happens when emotional regulation is missing

Without emotional regulation skills, it is easy to fall into cycles that make anxiety worse. You might avoid situations that could be meaningful because you fear the emotional cost, or you might react quickly and regret it later, which can harm relationships or your confidence. Over time, this can create a sense of being stuck, like your emotions are in control instead of you.

Why bullet journaling works so well

Bullet journaling blends structure with flexibility. It is not just a place to vent but a system to track, review, and plan. You can keep it as simple or as detailed as you like. Some days, I just fill in a few quick boxes about my mood and energy levels. Other days, I write more deeply about what happened and how I felt.

The key is that bullet journaling creates a pause between the feeling and the response. That pause is where emotional regulation begins.

The bottom line

Emotional dysregulation is something many people live with, whether because of anxiety disorders, neurodivergence, or other factors. It can make life feel unpredictable and exhausting.

For me, journaling, especially bullet journaling, has been that tool. It has turned overwhelming moments into opportunities for insight. It has taught me a language for my feelings and a process for working with them instead of against them.

If you have ever felt like your emotions are calling the shots, I encourage you to pick up a pen and start tracking. You might be surprised at how much power you already have, it is just waiting to be organised on the page.